Do We Really Control Our Own Destiny?

     There comes a time in everyone’s life when it is necessary to look back and consider all that has happened, both good and bad. It is then that we decide whether the good, or bad, out-weighs the other. If the good out-weighs the bad, then we have lived a good life and if the opposite, then our life has been less than exceptional. It is never too late to change how one’s life ends up as long as one is breathing. As Sherrilyn Kenyon said – “We are all writers of our lives. We can make our lives comedies or tragedies.” We have the control over our destinies. The Fates may weave, and unweave, our lives but we, alone, control our own destiny in a way that the Fates cannot change.

     It is true that there are certain things that occur in our lives that we cannot change, no matter how hard we try. The people we meet, the places we end up in and the end of our lives are all things that we cannot change, no matter what we do. The ins and outs of everyday life are what we control and that is where we make the difference. Our free will, our stupidity, is what makes our life good or bad. It isn’t the Fates that tell the criminal to rob or kill. It isn’t the Fates that tell the average person to decide to smoke that joint or snort that line. It is, however, the Fates that tell that person to love this man/woman, enter the military or to go to school to learn more. That is how they weave our lives. That is how, when in the end days, they unweave those lives.

     When our lives come to an end, and there is no changing that time, it is our decisions that determine how our life is ended. If we have lived a good life, did not break the law, did not do drugs or smoke or drink, then maybe it was the decision to go skiing on a dangerous mountain or to bungee jump or fly in a plane that is destined to crash. How we die is our choice, when we die is the decision of the Fates. It is the time from birth to that time of death that we control more than the Fates do. We make the day to day decisions that affect our lives, not the Fates.

     The ones that we fall in love with, what we end up doing for society and the people of the world, whether we are rich or poor, all these things are outside our influence. I know that there are those that will say everything that happens in our lives are our choices and, by and large, they are but there are those things that, no matter what we do, we have absolutely no control over. That is where our lives become a struggle; we fight what the Fates have set in stone for us. Even if we are doing what we think is best or what we want, if it is not in sync with our destiny, it becomes a chore. We may be having fun, we may think that we are happy, but it gets to where we sink deeper into an unconscious depression that will eat at us until we change course and get on the right path. This is where those that will say we choose our destinies are wrong because, even though we choose our day to day destinies, our life destinies are not ours to control.

     Whether you call it the Fates, the Norns or some other name, it is them that control our lives. We cannot fight what is already set in motion. You can beg the gods for whatever you desire from riches to lovers to whatever and if it is not in line with what the Fates have in store for you, it will not be yours. You may get that parking space you want on a daily basis, you may go to a place you don’t want to because that is what is on your mind, you may even win small amounts from the lottery if you believe hard enough but when it comes to the big stuff, making life changes, you may as well try telling your bedroom wall to move over a foot under its own power.

     I realize that I repeat a lot of what I say. This is not always intentional but there are those times that I do it for a reason. There are times that repetition is needed to get a point across well enough to be retained by the reader or listener. So if you don’t like the way I write, then read someone else’s blog. I don’t try to change people’s minds; I try to get people to look at things from a different angle, a different point of view. In other words, I try to get people to look at the world through open eyes and an open mind instead of a very narrow view and a closed mind. I hope I did my job.